Best Friend
Yesterday I went for a meaningful drive and walk with my best friend. It was a beautiful day for an adventure – the kind of day and weather I knew he would appreciate.
Even though Billie was with me in spirit only, I felt his presence yesterday as I do in this moment. He is still a source of peace, comfort, unconditional love, and laughter. So much has happened since he crossed the Rainbow Bridge five years ago, and the nine years we spent together were also filled with an incredible amount of change. Yet without question life was always better, easier, and happier with my best friend at my side.
Yesterday’s anniversary and our adventure were deeply emotional as I knew they would be. I missed the loved ones I wished could be there to share the day. It seems forever ago we went on “pack walks” as a family foursome. Yet I’m grateful to have so many wonderful memories, and to have loved ones to miss at all.
The wind finally carried a small portion of Billie’s cremains through the trees and over his favorite grassy hill. He loved sliding and rolling down that hill, cooling himself off in the lush green grass. I thought about the countless times we sat together in silence on that same spot. Billie was a true introvert – something we shared in common. We could say so much without saying anything at all. And although I couldn’t rest against him as I used to do, I was resting there with him regardless.
Billie loved me like no one else ever has, even though I could never hide any of my flaws from him. It wasn’t his duty to protect me, but he assumed that role as he matured. He sincerely cared about my safety and well-being. And he taught me so much, helping me to adapt to change while reminding me to live in the moment.
There will undoubtedly be future furry rescue companions to share my life again. And I know Billie would want that for me as much as I do too. But he will forever remain the best friend I’ve ever had.
mpardidotcom 
Thank you for posting this, Dana. Much as I wish I could have been there with you, I understand it was best for you and Billie to be just with each other. After all, that’s how you were even while others close to you were meaningful in their own ways.
I also have urns with cremains. I have not released them, and am not sure I ever will.
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Marco, I often wished you could have met Billie. I know he would have enjoyed being around you, since he always preferred the company of calm, caring people.
I brought a small jar of his cremains with us on the ride to Alpharetta, as well as his collar and one of his Nylabones.
In 2019 I was still grieving heavily after two full years. At that point I opened his cremains and looked through them, finding some of his teeth. That made me smile a little, thinking about how healthy they were even though he was nearly ten when he died. I guess I just needed to see what was left of his physical self.
Writing really helped me on this anniversary weekend. Thank you for the encouragement to do so, as well as providing the avenue for sharing my experiences and feelings.
Dana
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What a beautiful reflection, thank you. There are times when I think of the pets in my life, when thinking o them, I feel their presence. Just my imagination(?), I do not know, but as I age I am finding that all life is precious and worth treating with respect.
Peace Mark
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It is so nice to see a comment from you, Br. Mark. I’ve missed reading your perspective.
There have been times I swear I could have heard Billie. Of course I do not rule out the possibility of his spirit being with me even in ways I might be unaware. Even so, our non-human loved ones are equally important as the human ones, and it can be even more difficult for many when non-humans die. They are so much a part of our daily life and routines since we are responsible for them their entire lives.
Thank you for participating in this thread, and I hope we’ll hear more from you in future posts.
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What a beautiful tribute to a very special friend. Becky
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Becky, it’s nice to hear from you! Thanks for reading and commenting.
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Lovely. Just…lovely.
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Thank you, Mike.
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